Unrequited Love – He’s Just Not Worth Your Time

How do I know if a guy genuinely likes me and wants to be with me? The answer is clear-cut and simple – if he truly likes you, he will make sure you know he likes you. He will make sure his message is clear and won’t let you guess. He will definitely ask you out on a date, make good impressions, he will be afraid someone will pursue you before him.

Here are some of the signs that “He’s Just Not Worth Your Time.”

1. He never calls out on a date.

If a guy is really into you, he will want to know you. He will certainly ask you out on a date. Yes, even if he seems like a quiet person, he will do so too. So can a girl ask a guy out? I personally think yes, and after you ask him out for one date, if he wants to get to know you, he should be the one who makes the moves in the future.

2. He calls you out on a date whenever he’s convenient, but he is always busy when you call him out to meet.

He texts you in the afternoon and asks to meet tonight. The dinner was great. You two enjoyed the conversation and felt there was a connection, it’s just meant to be, or so you thought. After the date, he never calls out for quite some time. When you text him and ask how he was, if he wants coffee, he would always say, “I am busy.” But two weeks later, he would check on you and ask if you were up to meet again. “Oh, so he does care after all,” you canceled your plan with girlfriends and rushed to meet him. Again, the date was wonderful, but he never calls or texts you until he is “free” to date you again. The cycle continues.

Ladies, here’s the truth, he doesn’t want to have a serious relationship with you. He only calls you out because he found no other girl to be with. And you are the one who’s always available for him at his own convenience. Trust me, when he finds “his type of girl”, he will leave you alone and pretends nothing happened.

3. If people ask him about he and your relationship, he will give different answers – I am waiting on God for confirmation; I am not ready; I need more time; or just smiles and say nothing, whatever it is, he won’t say “we are together.”

Maybe he doesn’t want to be the “bad guy”, maybe he wants to keep you hanging around until he finds his perfect girl, just take it as “no” and move on. You deserve someone who will tell the whole world that you’re his girl.

4. If he treats you hot and cold, leave him.

You will enjoy warm chocolate fudge brownie with cold vanilla ice cream, but not from a person, let alone a guy you like. If someone treats you that way, leave him.

5. Stop finding excuses for him. He won’t appreciate it, nor does he need it.

Maybe he is not ready, God will prepare him. Maybe he needs a little more time. Maybe my personality scares him; maybe I talk too much; maybe I’m too quiet. Ask any girl who is happily married or has a good relationship with her boyfriend, will that guy ever make her feel that way? I can rest assured you. The answer is “NO.” Stop wasting your time. Again, if anyone ever makes you guess, leave him; he is not the one for you.

6. If he ever makes you doubt yourself, leave him.

Am I good enough, am I pretty enough, is my personality attractive enough? Girls, if anyone makes you feel that way, you should doubt if he is good enough for you, not yourself.

Get advice

Proverbs 24:6 So don’t go to war without wise guidance; victory depends on having many advisers.

When talking about pursuing dreams, one of the pieces of advice given is to talk to someone who has done it successfully before. I believe the same goes for love and relationships.

1. Go talk to happily married couples.

Ask how they get to know each other. If you talk to the guy, I rest assure he will praise his girl, he would say things like “I am attracted to her, The moment I saw her I felt like she’s the one for me and nobody else, I think she’s a very smart and pretty girl with a wonderful personality, I couldn’t believe she agrees to date me and agrees to a committed relationship,” and so on. If a guy likes you genuinely, this is exactly how he should make you feel. He should make you feel special, no other way around.

If you talk to the girl, ask her, “Did that guy ever make you doubt yourself? Did he make you wait for a long time before you two go on a date?” What would be her answers be? I bet you already knew her answers. I could imagine that girl having nothing to worry about, except to decide if she wants to go on a date with this guy and make her part of the effort to know him better

2. Always remember the Lord is a Lord of clarity, not confusion.

Movies and love songs tell us that love is complicated, confusing, and hurting. But God himself works the other way round. Our God is the God of clarity, not confusion. Always keep that in mind.

3. Ask God for wisdom and discernment.

James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously to all without reproach, and it will be given to him.

If you encounter the above situation (He’s just not worth your time), pray to God to bring things to light. Ask God to remove the veil and reveal the truth. Ask God to open your eyes so that you won’t be “blinded by love”.

Last but not least, I want to let you know that God loves you. Your self-worth is not determined by someone who doesn’t value you as much as God does. You deserve to get over a heartbreak, you deserve to walk out from unrequited love, you deserve someone who loves you, and you deserve to be loved.